A Special Weekend – Happy Place Open Discussion

Feb 6

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Caterpillars, moths, butterflies, and all creatures great and small,

butterflies_peace_sign_framed_tileSeveral months ago, Kindheart101 recommended a “Happy Place” thread where people could share something about their experiences or a video that brings a smile.

This is a special weekend for me with family and friends. I probably won’t have time to write any new posts which makes it perfect for you guys to participate in conversation sharing kindness and what makes you happy.   Even if you’re down in the dumps, be happy to share it here.

I’ll start with this video of a humorous song by Irene Reid.

 

Posted on 02/06/2015, in Happiness and Kindness, Happy Place, open discussion and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 41 Comments.

  1. yahtzeebutterfly | 02/06/2015 at 3:33 pm

    A “Happy Place” page…what a great place to land on! 🙂

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  2. Gronda Morin | 02/06/2015 at 5:08 pm

    Here is a nice but long story. Recently, I met a young lady at a friend’s house who was very upset about being fired from a local rehabilitation center. As she described her circumstances, I became furious at how unfairly she had been treated. I went out of my way to coach her as to what steps she could take to remedy her situation. It turns out she has been hearing impaired for all of her life but she compensates well. Still if an employer was not aware of this fact, they could get the wrong impression regarding her skill level because she is not as quick as others with her language skills. Any way she was really down on herself when I was able to offer encouragement. I advised her that I was impressed by her determination to work and to overcome obstacles while not giving up. It turns out that she is a Carnegie Mellon grad with a good GPA, and that she had been in the process of taking nursing courses in which she earned the grade of A across the board. She obtained her degree in Fine Arts, which she explained ended up being worthless if she wanted to earn a decent living.

    I had directed her to start by contacting Vocational Rehabilitation Center which is a government program designed to assist a disabled person with whatever support they need to become employed. Then I referred her to EEOC, the Equal Employment Opportunity center to file a claim of discrimination. Typically, an employee has about 180 days after being fired to file a charge against the employer. Then I sat next to her while she filed her unemployment claim. I explained that the employer would fight this by claiming that she was fired for cause. They do not know that she kept a copy of what they call “24” hour reports by which she documented any problems with various patients. When they fired her, the Director of Nursing told this young lady that she had reviewed all her “24” hour reports and that she had never documented any concerns about a particular patient even though she had a copy proving otherwise. She decided not to share this information thinking that it would be a waste of time. She believed she was fired for marking the report that the patient was very angry at this center for various reasons to where he had refused treatment for a wound. She said she had been sick that week and so she worked very few hours. Her thoughts were that if she was marking her reports correctly while others were marking their reports that they had rendered treatment when they had not, this could be a problem for management. She said something about this center being at an open stage of being inspected by State officials, so that if there was a patient with a worsening wound, her note of him not receiving treatment while others noted that he had received care, this would be a red flag.

    She could be correct about her theory, but I did further research for her. It turns out that this company had fired 6 other personnel during the same time period,only they were given the option to resign. I found the information to explain what was transpiring in the U.S. News & World Report under the section of Health Rankings & Advice and other resources It turns out that this rehabilitation center had received extremely poor grades by a Medicare inspection in April, 2014 for their nursing to patient ratio. Following this news, management fired the entire nursing staff and then hired a new group of nursing personnel. The number of new nursing employees put them in a better position to earn a better grade for the next evaluation.The grade which they received and which was published on 1/22/15 ended up being 3 stars out of 5. This boosted their overall rating at two stars out of 5. If they had not taken these steps, it is very likely that they would have received a rating of 1 star out of 5 which would have placed them with the worst rating in the entire region. They then fired 7 people the following week.

    When I shared this data with this young lady, she was extremely grateful and her attitude became much more positive. She had already been working with Vocational Rehabilitation Center and they were extremely helpful to her. The unemployment office contacted her because they had no record of her having worked at this place.The young lady told me that she was dropping off her W2 form. Based on my directions, she has started the process to file an EEOC claim. She has forwarded a complaint about poor patient care to AHCA.

    I did advise her of my suspicion that this employer may have misplaced her application where she marked that she has a hearing impairment, just so she could share this concern with EEOC. I also emailed her how to access free legal assistance.

    It was such a pleasure to work with someone effectively. I am feeling great over being to help a young person based on knowledge attained from my life experiences.

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  3. chuquestaquenumber1 | 02/07/2015 at 6:37 pm

    This song fits the Happy place theme. To all minions I hope you enjoy.

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  4. yahtzeebutterfly | 02/07/2015 at 10:36 pm

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  5. chuquestaquenumber1 | 02/08/2015 at 10:20 am

    To continue the Happy Place Discussion. Watch a movie called The Adventures of Milo and Otis. It’s about a dog and cat friendship.

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  6. butterflydreamer2 | 02/10/2015 at 12:54 am

    My dear butterfly family,

    This may not be a happy discussion, but a needed one. I feel I could not say nothing and leave my family wondering about me, so here I go.

    I have been mia for several weeks now. I went to they hospital with shortness of breath and a dry cough. I never go to the hospital, a phobia of mine, but my family insisted, and there I stayed for about a week, running tests, telling me alittle, not all, that I will hear in early March, when I am to start chemo and radiology, or whatever. What I do know is I have kidney cancer, it may have gone to the lungs, bones, and or brain.

    First and the only thing on my bucket list, is a week at the ocean. A week without Moonshadow, but I feel needed after 6 years. We went to the ocean last weekend, it was beautiful. I threw my blanket on the sand and fell asleep. The next day when I got home, I told my husband it was going to be okay, he will know when the time has come. He said no, it’s not you’re time, we have a grandson to raise. I said I know, but I am no longer scarred and when the time comes you will know. He cried and said he knew, when I was sleeping he saw a look on my face he had never seen, I was at peace.

    So my family, if I become mia, remember, the music is all around us, all you have to do is listen. From the movie August Rush.

    One of my favorites

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    • yahtzeebutterfly | 02/10/2015 at 7:35 am

      Tears are welling up in my eyes as I have read your message to us.

      Butterflydreamer, our sweet Dreamer, I am holding you close in my heart and wish I were with you right now so that I could hug you.

      How wonderful that you enjoyed a beautiful time at the beach. Being originally from California, I know you enjoyed the sand under you feet, the salt air, and the sound of the steady waves. The ocean has such a restorative and gentle effect on the spirit.

      Oh, and dear Butterflydreamer, you have always so brightened the pages here with your beautiful, caring heart that I have always looked forward to your comments. 🙂 You have always been a breath of fresh air to me here on Xena’s blog.

      I am sending you a bright wave of positive energy and love, dear Sister.

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      • butterflydreamer2 | 02/10/2015 at 8:41 am

        yahtzee,

        I wish you were here so you could hug me, my heart is heavy, and the tears flow. You are a big part of why I could not walk away without saying how much I Luv you all.

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        • yahtzeebutterfly | 02/10/2015 at 9:27 am

          I have found a photo of two flowers which I would like you to see as being the two of us together in spirit today and in the coming days.

          It is a huge picture. Let its size express how much I care about you and all that you are experiencing in your heart, Dreamer.

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        • yahtzeebutterfly | 02/10/2015 at 12:22 pm

          And, Dreamer, I do wish I could be there with you to support and lift up your heavy heart and help you during your tearful moments.

          Love you.

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    • mindyme62 | 02/10/2015 at 10:45 am

      Thank you for sharing this with us. I’m so sorry

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    • Xena | 02/10/2015 at 11:51 am

      Butterflydreamer,
      Prayers, prayers, positive thoughts and everything else I can muster from spirit is with you. I appreciate your positive outlook, but that doesn’t mean that I have to accept things without a putting forth what I can. There’s some good cancer treatments available and it won’t hurt to ask your doctor about the use of natural supplements. May the spirit of life and peace surround your very being.

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      • butterflydreamer2 | 02/10/2015 at 1:14 pm

        Thanks Xena.

        I have been to the hospital twice, both for child birth. Other than that, never been put to sleep (big time phobia). I have the admitting Dr who pretty well tells me it’s over, leaves me there for a week, and then a cancer Dr, who then tells me there is no reason for me to be there, they have come a long way with cancer, they can give me drugs and I could live for many more years. He gets me released and I have an appointment set on the third of March, now that I have insurance. I will learn more there. The first Dr would not release me until my bill was taken care of. I quickly wrote a check for almost $20,000. I told my family, never take me to the hospital, better find some cyanide pill or something, it will be a cold day in h… before I go to the hospital.

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        • Xena | 02/10/2015 at 1:42 pm

          Butterflydreamer,
          Hospitals can be scary places, which is why when I pray for those undergoing medical treatment, I pray that wisdom is giving to those treating the patient. Cancer treatment drugs have improved over the years. I remember a time when patients on chemo were unable to continue working. It can and does often make patients ill, but they have learned now that patients can survive on baby-food rather than deplete themselves of nutrients.

          It’s a total disappointment when medical personnel is more interested in getting the bill paid that in providing necessary medical care. But, don’t let that discourage you. Talk to your insurance company and see if they will appoint a care specialist to you so you don’t have to concern yourself with claims and bills.

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    • Lolypop | 02/10/2015 at 8:01 pm

      Oh my goodness, I’m so sad butterflydreamer.
      I can’t help it. I hope and pray that it will not spread.
      Can you have one removed?
      Just to hear the word scares anyone so much.
      You must have been mortified.
      I will go out tonight and look up in the sky and tell all of the angels that they have to get to work for our friend.
      We love you so much!!!!
      Lolypop

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  7. Lolypop | 02/10/2015 at 3:09 am

    This has been one of my favorites!! : )
    It makes my heart happy! lol

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    • Xena | 02/10/2015 at 1:35 pm

      Oh Loly! That’s a wonderful video. The message is profound. Thanks so much for sharing it.

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      • Lolypop | 02/10/2015 at 3:42 pm

        Glad you like it! : )
        Funny my son uesed profoundly so often.
        He would say I love you profoundly and say do you know how much that is?
        PLUS he loved this video.
        Your post just made me smile!! : )

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  8. Faith Simone | 02/10/2015 at 1:20 pm

    My co-worker is playing music I can pop to while I’m on my lunch break. Me + good music = my happy place!

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  9. Lolypop | 02/10/2015 at 3:49 pm

    Hey,
    Did y’all see this???? LOLOLOL

    http://www.greenvillegazette.com/john-stewart-being-gay-is-not-a-choice-but-being-a-texas-republican-is/?fb=10

    I’m a Texans and he’s right!!! LOL
    I especially loved it for that reason.
    Any place ele, I would not have commited. : )
    Sorry, hope not to offend anyone, I know we never talk politics, but this one I just had to share. : )

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    • Xena | 02/11/2015 at 2:16 pm

      Lolypop,
      I should probably do a blog post on the history of marriage. Maybe because my maternal grandparents were immigrants and my maternal grandfather a minister, I understood things about how marriage was recognized before the states passed marriage laws. State sanctioned marriage was never about sex as in intercourse or what two consenting adults do. It is about property ownership and beneficiaries and came about because widowed wives were denied rights as heirs. It was discrimination against women.

      Well, you just inspired me to write about this. 🙂

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      • Lolypop | 02/11/2015 at 4:07 pm

        Xena,
        How interesting.
        My maternal family was from France and Switzerland.
        My paternal from Ireland. How we all ended up in Texas I’ll never know.
        I guess I especially got such fun out of his comment because my son was
        gay. He knew who he was but LOVED church. ME, not so but, that was his only struggle. Every pastor he spoke with told him he was going to hell.
        He was who he was and WE were so very proud of him.
        Fortunately, my whole family was and at the end of his sweet life, he died in such peace.

        I’m not sure if I’m responding right, but you inspired me to write this and it’s a good thing. : )
        I love talking about my son because he inspired me so much. He was so much fun to be with, to travel with and my daughter and him, VERY special.
        My son’s partner wished that they could have gotten married, but my son was happy
        with him. If they could have gotten married, I would have been happy for both of them.
        As far as we’re concerned his partner is our son and always will be in our life.

        He was a late graduate, but taught the second grade and also childrens curch.
        I laugh, because when I think about how he prepared was something.
        He taught 2 children as though he was prepared to teach 30. : )
        I have so many hearaches, BUT so many smiles when I think of him, his laugh and him trying to answer questions that I did not understand. : )
        What a job!! : )

        I guess we inspire each other to write about different things. : )
        I love it!!!!! 🙂

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        • Xena | 02/11/2015 at 7:36 pm

          Lolypop,
          I truly wish that those Christians who believe in a sin-scale stop believing that. I also wish that those Christians who believe in natural understanding of “hell” pray for spiritual understanding. I can feel the love you have for your son and my condolences for your lost.

          My inspiration to write today was superseded by other things that totally exhausted me. 🙂

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          • Lolypop | 02/11/2015 at 9:32 pm

            My goodness, Xena!
            I don’t know how you keep up with all that you do.
            You amaze me.
            When you’re inspired, you do something about it.
            When I’m inspired I post. lol
            That IS a big job for me. : )
            Thanks for your sweet love and kindness!
            Always!

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  10. Lolypop | 02/10/2015 at 8:06 pm

    Butterflydreamer please forgive me for sounding so insensative
    I didn’t see your post. There is no laughing matter here.

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    • butterflydreamer2 | 02/10/2015 at 10:26 pm

      Lolypop,

      I luv you sister, and yes you can live with one kidney. Other than that, I don’t know anything and I will wait for the Dr to fill me in, and of course I will relay the info.

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  11. Lolypop | 02/11/2015 at 1:13 am

    Thanks butterflydreamer!
    I love you and I know that waiting can be hell.
    I know there will be lots of positive thoughts and prayers and I’m thankful that you shared with all of us what it’s about. It’s hard not to talk to anyone about it and we are all with you and will stay right with you and any time you want to talk, we’re here.
    I know March 3rd sounds like a long time. Love you!!!!

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